Talk show

When I saw Michelle being brave and putting up all her UFOs, I admired that. I wanted to give it a try, but I ... just can't quiet do that, there is still too much shame just because of the number of UFOs in my closet. So I decided to let out the sweaters only, for today. While arraning them, it's like they started talking to me. Here's what they had to say.
Blue Fluffy: Hey you, I'm almost finished. What's wrong with you, you have only 15 something inches to go and then some minimal seeming. Why don't you just finish me?
Chocolate Mocha: Because she is thinking about me. Whenever she works on one of you, she is thinking about how nice it would be to finish me. It's all about me.
Me: Hey chocolate mocha, cool it. I love all my sweaters to be. I love them all equally.
BF: Then why don't you finish me?
Me: I ... I don't know. I will work on you. I promise to finish you soon.
Cable Sweater: And what about me? Did you forget about me. I was supposed to be your first sweater, but you haven't knit any rows for over a month. I knit up nicely, I don't snag, I'm soft ... I behave like a good yarn. I even went and got stitchmarkers to make myself more pretty. And you just ignore me. Or are you planning on leaving me like this, a front panel with a strap in the back?
[And then the white yarn enters the stage...]
White Yarn: Easy for you all to say. She hasn't even touched me. What's wrong with me? I promise to knit up nicely, I want get into any knots, I will be good to you, I was made with german efficiency. And look at my little specks of color, aren't they pretty. Oh, oh I know what you're thinking, as soon as the new yarn comes, you're gonna cast on with that one.
Me: I want to cast on with you, white yarn, but I have no Denise cables free just now. I think about you. I even have a pattern for you...
[Sarcastic 'uhm hmm's from the audience]
Me: No really, I do ... Ok, here is my promise to you all. Blue fluffy, I will finish you very soon, if only to free up the Denise cable. White yarn, you are right, chances are I will cast on with the new yarn...
WY: I knew it. [ Runs off crying and I chase it.]
Me: White yarn, don't worry, I have a pattern for you but it is not quiet perfect for you yet. Just waiting for the inspiration to hit me and then you will be gorgeous. I'm not strong enough to stand up to the new yarn, it's tweed. TWEEEEEEEED!
WY: Promise?
Me: I promise. And cable sweater, just be a little patient. I will not leave you like this. You will be gorgeous too. Finally, chocolate mocha, you can't be so demanding. I do think about you a lot but you are my youngest projects. There are some other things that just need to be finished before you.

So, there you have it. Next time, the war in lapghanistan: the blankets speak up.

Am I crazy, probably. But most people think I am pretty harmless.